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Feature of the Month: Putting Yourself on the List by Cyndi Mathis


Cyndi explains the importance of making self-care a priority

As women we spend the majority of our time putting our needs and ourselves on the back burner. Women are nurturers by nature and once we become wives and mothers, this becomes even more true. I was fortunate enough that I did not have to work outside of the home (although being a homemaker is for sure a full time job), so my sole purpose was to care for my daughter and my husband and make sure that they were cared for and loved. I was happy and my life was complete – or at least, that’s what I thought.

We make lists of things that we need to get done on a daily basis but usually something or someone gets left off. Sadly for me, I was often left off my own list. No matter what was on my list or what I was doing, if my husband or child needed me the world stopped and it soon became apparent that I had no real life outside of them and their needs. I have no regrets about the way I chose to live my life but, when my daughter left for college, it gave me the opportunity to explore who I was and, as I teasingly put it, “become a person and a woman again”.

It was a time for me to get back to discovering what made me tick and what made me happy. It was also a time for me to rediscover my relationship with my husband. In doing these things, I finally started to put myself back on the list.

As you list your own priorities, I urge you to always put yourself on the list. You may never be at the top of the list but as long as you are on it, you will be a better wife, mother, friend, sister, auntie, employee, boss, daughter, and person. Learn to embrace yourself and make time for yourself and your needs.

I now know that if I am not happy and complete it is virtually impossible to make those that I hold near and dear happy and complete.  Hopefully, we can add to the joy to the lives of those we love, but we must all learn to love ourselves first. The rest will follow.

If you're not happy and complete, it is

Life can get busy, but always make time for you. Here are some ways we can make time for ourselves even when we have tons of other responsibilities:

  1. Plan a solo trip or take a trip with your best girlfriends once a year. Leave the husband and kids behind and just enjoy being a woman!

  2. Make yourself feel beautiful by treating yourself to a relaxing mani/pedi every other week.

  3. Pamper yourself at the spa! Have a facial, scrub, massage – or all three!

  4. Make time for your health and fitness by scheduling a 30 minute workout everyday. Get out of the house if you can and go to the gym! If you absolutely cannot get away, look up no-equipment workouts on Youtube.

  5. If you are a stay at home mom, go see a matinee while the kids are at school.


My awesome mama has spoken and I couldn’t agree more. Self-care is so important! How do you keep yourself on the list?

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