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A Day in the Life of a Basketball Wife – Part 7

It’s hard to believe that this is my seventh A Day in the Life of a Basketball Wife segment. I recently took a little break from the blogasphere (this is actually my first post in almost a month) and during my time off, I told myself I was going to do a lot of soul searching about the direction that I want to take with LiveLifeWell going forward. During my hiatus, I received not one, not two, but THREE messages from wives or girlfriends of professional athletes either asking for advice or letting me know that they can relate to my experiences and enjoy reading about my life as a basketball wife. This reinforced that LiveLifeWell should be what I originally intended it to be: a space where I share about my unique lifestyle not only for people to learn about what it’s really like, but also for other people who find themselves in similar situations to come for guidance and/or reassurance. I’m excited to continue to share about my experiences as a basketball wife in hopes that I can continue to do both of those things.

In this segment of A Day in the Life of a Basketball Wife, I'm sharing my plan for staying calm during what is sure to be a volatile off-season

If you’ve been following my A Day in the Life of a Basketball Wife posts, you know that for the first time ever, my husband and I decided that it would be best for us to spend the basketball season apart. He’s been in France this season while I’ve been home in Atlanta finishing up the internship hours to complete my master’s degree in marriage and family therapy. If I’m frank, it’s been the toughest 10 months of my life (and I think my husband would agree) and I am NEVER doing this long distance marriage thing again (the reasons why are another post of another day). While it’s been really difficult being apart, we’ve both accomplished some of our personal goals and are beyond ready to be reunited very soon.

While I’m obviously overjoyed that my husband is headed home and excited for what the summer has in store, the off-season is usually hard for me. For basketball wives, the off-season is the time when new contracts are negotiated and signed. While some are lucky enough to have signed multi-year deals, my husband typically signs one year contracts with his overseas teams, so from year to year, we have no idea where he’ll be playing next. The uncertainty of this lifestyle is not ideal for a control freak like me, and my anxiety usually rears an ugly head during this time of year.

This year, I’m trying a new approach in an attempt to actually enjoy the summer instead of spending it waiting by the phone for a call from my husband’s agent about teams that might in interested in signing him. I’ll be trying these methods to keep my cool this summer, and I hope that if you find yourself in an uncertain situation, you can apply them as well.

3 Ways for Basketball Wives to Stay Calm this Off-Season

  1. Commit to unplugging. I’m guilty of checking my phone constantly during the off-season for any word on potential contracts. This summer, my husband and I have both decided to commit to unplugging and not being on our phones as much overall. We’re going to trust that the right call will come at just the right time and accept that checking our phones isn’t going to make it come any faster.

  2. Be present in the moment. Being present in the moment is something that, as a planner, I often struggle with, but being away from my husband for 10 months has really put things into perspective, and this off-season, I’m planning to focus on being present in every moment that I share with him. Instead of always looking ahead and thinking about the future, sometimes just being intentional about enjoying the here and now goes a long way.

  3. Look at the glass half full. It’s easy for both basketball players and wives alike to get down when they haven’t signed a contract yet at a certain point in the summer. If my husband and I find ourselves in this situation, I’m going to look at the glass half full instead of half empty. While it can be scary to not have a contract, it also means a longer off-season and more time at home. I’m going to focus on being happy that I get to spend a few more weeks with family and friends instead of being so concerned about when we’re leaving and where we’re going.

The off-season can be volatile for basketball wives. Use these 3 tips to keep your cool and stay calm even when things are uncertain.

If you’re the wife or girlfriend of a professional athlete or live a lifestyle that can be volatile, how do you cope with the uncertainty? I’m always looking for strategies and would love to hear yours!

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